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Wednesday, January 16 Local

No, Godzilla can’t go ice skating in Connecticut

How thick would the ice have to be if, for example, Godzilla wanted to go skating?

It’s unseasonably warm in Connecticut — don’t expect any ponds to freeze anytime soon — but it’s apparently something folks in the city of Oconomowoc, in southeastern Wisconsin, need to worry about.

The city shared on its Facebook page a handy dandy guide to minimum necessary ice thicknesses.

So, if the ice is less than 2 inches, stay on the shore. More than 5 inches thick and your snowmobile is safe.

Don’t drive your Dodge Ram onto the ice until it’s at least 12 inches thick, and don’t even think of using your AT-AT — you know, the four-legged attack vehicles used on the ice planet Hoth in “Start Wars” — until the ice is at least 50 inches thick.

Godzilla? He can’t skate until the ice is 100 inches thick, according to the Oconomowoc guide.

The great lizard should stay out of Connecticut, at least for the forseeable future, if he intends any ice fishing. The temperature is expected to hover around the freezing mark, dipping below during the night and rising above with the sun, for at least the next 10 days, according to Accuweather.

And in case you were curious, the ice in Oconomowoc, too, is probably too thin for AT-ATs or snowmobiles or even you, for that matter. The forecast there calls for temperatures only a bit lower than here in Connecticut.

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